Happy Monday babes! I am back from my weekend break. Sometimes you just need to unplug and recharge. Today I wanted to talk about something that has been bothering me and I’ve been ashamed of. I haven’t been the perfect wife. There I said it. My husband is the most amazing man. God has truly blessed me with such a handsome, hardworking, loving, husband. He is so romantic and always shows up with flowers. (My love language is gifts lol). But to be honest, I don’t deserve him. He is so good to me but I’m not always good to him.
I love my husband, I truly do. But sometimes I am mean to him. I lose my temper with him, I snap at him, short fuse and all, impatient. Why? Why am I being so mean to my husband when I talk about being kind to everyone? I know y’all are thinking, “Why don’t you practice what you preach lady?” LOL I’m not perfect, far from it. Why am I treating my husband like this? My husband is such a sweetheart and loves me so much that he never complains when I snap at him he just takes it. I know I’m such a B*tch. How can I treat the man I love like this?
That’s when it dawned on me that it’s not him I’m mad at, it is me. I’m so stressed, overwhelmed, mad at myself. Being a mom is hard but I love it so much. No matter how tired I am at the end of the day, Lily is worth it. I love being a stay at home and I love being her mom but at times I get overwhelmed. I take it out on him because well, he is the closest person to me. What a Shitty wife I am.
That’s why I needed the social media break. Y’all I love this community so much. I finally found mama friends and I finally found something that I love to do (blogging.) But trying to build my brand and gain exposure and keeping up with pods was stressing me out. Every time my notifications went off I was engaged into my phone not giving Lily all the attention she deserved and my husband. I was stressed out when I had so many notifications going off, I knew I needed a break from social media. Because honestly, all of that can wait. My husband and my daughter come first. I need to remind myself that hey, this is something you love to do but you love your family more. I admit it that it is so hard to find a balance between blogger/ wife/ mom.
But going forth I am now going to try to balance everything. Instagram can wait and notifications can wait. I want to be in the moment with my husband and daughter and really make memories. I don’t ever want Lily to grow up and be like, “My mom is always on her phone, she doesn’t spend time with me.” Here is to making a change in my life. Please keep me in your prayers while I try to balance all of this and I will also pray for my fellow mama friends.
& to my husband: Thank you for always loving me through the good and the bad, for being so patient with me, for always working so hard to provide for our family, for believing in me through my new journey as a blogger. I love you so much and I promise I’m going to work on myself. I love you<3